I've come to a decision.
Something that reminded me of one of the reasons I needed to make this decision, was a blog I happened across yesterday.
You see, I love to write. I may not be spectacular at it, but I love it anyway. You ought to see the stack of journals I keep at home, all filled up with this small handwriting crammed into every square inch of paper. I know that to write well, you have to be willing to be transparent in a lot of ways. The stuff we write has to come from somewhere...and if we are unable to reach down into those places, then the stuff we write is pretty shallow.
Unfortunately, we spend our lives helping each other pound down our feelings...and our creativity. There is no more room for daydreams in the harsh reality of life. Damn that sucks.
I have become expert at pounding, although the results often leave a little more to be desired. My desires and emotions that I have worked hard at killing, tend to resurrect themselves at the most inconvenient times.
Why would I even think of doing such a thing in the first place?!? Why would any of us?!?!? Well, I know that for me, as much as I don't want to fit into the box, I have to make a living. Right now, making a living means; answering the phone, answering the phone, answering the phone. Oh yes, let me count the joys. There's just not a lot of opportunity around here these days though. So, you have to do what you have to do. I can't move just now, and I am not completely sure that I want to. Seattle is nice, but I don't want to be stoned in the street for daring to vote Republican. =P hehe.
So, here's my decision. I am just going to work on being me. That that means is, if I am having a bad day, I am going to write that. If I am having a hilarious day, I am going to write like everything is funny. If I am having a....well, you get it.
I am tired of having to throw in hope and smiles because I am a Christian. Sometimes I get mad at God. Sometimes I hate my life. What good is it doing me to pretend otherwise?? How is it helping me, or anyone else? It isn't. This is what sucks about the church. It isn't always so great and glorious. Everything isn't simple. Everyday isn't filled with smiles, and don't treat me like it has to be. We begin to treat each other like unhappiness, or discontent are a sure sign that we have backslidden and are on a fast track to hell. Well, you know what? I am glad that God is not as fake and shallow as we are. And I am glad that just because the 40 hour work week is the American status quo, doesn't mean that God isn't a little more imaginative.
Saying that doesn't mean that I am not mad at Him, and that we don't have some things to work out. It's just the truth. I know it is, even if I am cranky. Don't get me wrong please...I am not cursing God. He is. I mean, He is God, He is there, He is everywhere, and I believe in Him. I believe His word is true, and that we should live accordingly...
I just don't always do that very well, and I am still working some things out in my mind, and that is okay, because He wants us to follow Him completely, and sometimes the precursor to that is that we rebel a little. We get reminded why we don't want to go the other way.
I want to believe completely. I want to know why I do. I don't want to be swallowed by the church, who will tell me everything I need to know. Sometimes I need to work a few things out on my own.
So I am just working on being real. Who I really am. And this is me today.
Wednesday, July 27, 2005
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
Austin
Well, it sounds like Becky is getting a job in Texas. They are just calling her references and whatnot, but they hit it off really well, and I think it sounds like a sure thing. What is it about Texas that steals my friends away and makes me fly there all the time for weddings?!?! haha.
Anyway, she asked if I want to go with her. She'll live at the camp where she works, but I would be getting my own place, which is okay with me. It would be in the Austin area.
But...I am just not sure how I feel about it. It isn't that I have anything against Texas. I am all for living in a gun-totin' red state. hehe. Still, it's a long way from home, and I would miss my little sister. Part of me is like...no, no, no, I don't wanna! The other part is saying, Please Amanda, just do SOMETHING! Go! Why not?!?!
I tell myself that there isn't really any reason for me to stay here. Really it's just that I can't imagine what kind of job I can move on to here. Everything is the same. I don't live in a booming job kind of community. I can't imagine myself at my current job forever, and the prospect of job hunting again is like a nightmare.
The thing is, I need to go to school. If I move to Austin I am going to have that whole "between states" thing going on, which is not always so good as far as tuition and fees are concerned. Grr.
Anyway, I have no idea what I am going to do.
Anyway, she asked if I want to go with her. She'll live at the camp where she works, but I would be getting my own place, which is okay with me. It would be in the Austin area.
But...I am just not sure how I feel about it. It isn't that I have anything against Texas. I am all for living in a gun-totin' red state. hehe. Still, it's a long way from home, and I would miss my little sister. Part of me is like...no, no, no, I don't wanna! The other part is saying, Please Amanda, just do SOMETHING! Go! Why not?!?!
I tell myself that there isn't really any reason for me to stay here. Really it's just that I can't imagine what kind of job I can move on to here. Everything is the same. I don't live in a booming job kind of community. I can't imagine myself at my current job forever, and the prospect of job hunting again is like a nightmare.
The thing is, I need to go to school. If I move to Austin I am going to have that whole "between states" thing going on, which is not always so good as far as tuition and fees are concerned. Grr.
Anyway, I have no idea what I am going to do.
Monday, July 18, 2005
Sometimes I hate my life.
I know I am just having a bad day, and that in a couple of days I will have completely snapped out of it. Okay, maybe not completely, but mostly. Still, so often there's this lingering dissatisfaction about life. I tell my friends..."No, don't worry, I am fine, I don't mean it to sound so bad." The reality though...sometimes it is that bad.
Today I was reading my friends blog. She's in the peace corp.
When I looked at a picture of her over there, I just saw all of her successes flash before my eyes. And, you know, she's my friend so I am glad for her. I love her and all.
But sometimes I hate her.
Because she's good at all the things I am bad at. She finds opportunities where I find dark, empty rooms. She finds motivation where I find depression and apathy. Arrggg! =P
When I was younger I had this grand plan for my life. When that plan got burnt up like so many wild grasses after the lightening, I still looked ahead brightly. I just made new plans. I branched out in what I had wanted. But all good things crumble into dust. Or at least it often seems so. I used to be an optimist, can you believe it?!
I have just been dissapointed, so. very. many. times.
The funny thing is, I have little patience with people who talk like this, because we all know well enough that life goes on. Just suck it up. Who knows what might be around the bend?! Oh, the irony!
I just feel wasted. Wasted brains that need an education. Wasted heart that needs something to be passionate about. I am always trying to find my niche. Find that something that I am good at, all can get into, find that place where I belong. Sometimes I really wonder if there is such a place.
*sigh* but I am going to keep on keeping on, because that is all we can do. Try to be kind, and serve the people around us. Try to see the silver lining, and not be a person constantly raining on other peoples parades. Look up!
That friendly upbeat person? That's who I used to be. That's who I want to be. I want to say I am strong, and whatever comes I will face it head on, and I will be an overcomer. No matter what kind of nasty lemons life hands me, I will make tasty lemonade. I have lost faith in me though. Too many failures. Too many grievances hidden in my heart.
This uphill battle of mine. *shrug* what can I say? This is how I feel. This is where I am. This is where I usually am.
And I want to belive Him. And I want to know that it could change. But I don't know it. And if I just had whatever it takes to get through it anyway, with the kind of integrity that I want to walk out, then maybe that would be enough...but I find it hard to do sometimes.
"I find it hard to say..that everything is alright..."(LH)
Okay, enough bitching.
I am off for today.
Today I was reading my friends blog. She's in the peace corp.
When I looked at a picture of her over there, I just saw all of her successes flash before my eyes. And, you know, she's my friend so I am glad for her. I love her and all.
But sometimes I hate her.
Because she's good at all the things I am bad at. She finds opportunities where I find dark, empty rooms. She finds motivation where I find depression and apathy. Arrggg! =P
When I was younger I had this grand plan for my life. When that plan got burnt up like so many wild grasses after the lightening, I still looked ahead brightly. I just made new plans. I branched out in what I had wanted. But all good things crumble into dust. Or at least it often seems so. I used to be an optimist, can you believe it?!
I have just been dissapointed, so. very. many. times.
The funny thing is, I have little patience with people who talk like this, because we all know well enough that life goes on. Just suck it up. Who knows what might be around the bend?! Oh, the irony!
I just feel wasted. Wasted brains that need an education. Wasted heart that needs something to be passionate about. I am always trying to find my niche. Find that something that I am good at, all can get into, find that place where I belong. Sometimes I really wonder if there is such a place.
*sigh* but I am going to keep on keeping on, because that is all we can do. Try to be kind, and serve the people around us. Try to see the silver lining, and not be a person constantly raining on other peoples parades. Look up!
That friendly upbeat person? That's who I used to be. That's who I want to be. I want to say I am strong, and whatever comes I will face it head on, and I will be an overcomer. No matter what kind of nasty lemons life hands me, I will make tasty lemonade. I have lost faith in me though. Too many failures. Too many grievances hidden in my heart.
This uphill battle of mine. *shrug* what can I say? This is how I feel. This is where I am. This is where I usually am.
And I want to belive Him. And I want to know that it could change. But I don't know it. And if I just had whatever it takes to get through it anyway, with the kind of integrity that I want to walk out, then maybe that would be enough...but I find it hard to do sometimes.
"I find it hard to say..that everything is alright..."(LH)
Okay, enough bitching.
I am off for today.
Friday, July 15, 2005
Where are they now?!!
Here is my list of "where are they now's." It's a pretty random list that won't mean anything to anyone else, but that is just fine with me. Aren't I doing this blog for my own entertainment? =)
Person #1) Chris Davlin. (aka Chris2, Curse or Cursy Wursy):
Where the heck are you? Chris is my friend from high school. I have this memory of him singing to me at the piano in the choir room. I also have numerous memories of walks, and talks, and coffees. Life has gone different ways for us, judging from the last time we spoke. ( I think about eight years ago, maybe seven), but I love him still, as if I were there listening to him sing.
*I memorized that poem you wrote in my 11th grade yearbook. That poem meant more to me than anything I ever read in a book.
#2 & #3) Joe Powers & Bill Yen (two guys I met on the way to Olympia)
Okay, so I didn't know them very long, but some people have a profound impact alright?! Joe was the best friend. Well, if you must, best friend with all those oogly googly feelings. =) Bill was big brother (even though we were the same age) We all got along so well. I loved those guys for that time we spent together, and I still think about them once in awhile. Fond memories. Very fond.
*Joe, I think I have a nametag that belongs to you.
#4) Deena Worden (Who I met in Amsterdam)
Deena. I miss ya. One of my fondest memories from my time in Amsterdam, is creeping down to the kitchen at 11:30 p.m. and sitting in the dark drinking tea, and usually eating popcorn, with you and Marcos. What I wouldn't give to be back there right now. I wish I could have transported that nightly occurence home with me. We didn't even hang out tons the rest of the time, but those nightly chats meant a lot to me, and I miss you two. I hope you are well.
#5) Angela Hernandez (was Pfeiffer)
Ang, I swear you have dropped off the face of the earth!!! How hard is it to drop an email once in six months?!?! How many kids do you have now anyway!?!?! =) Where ARE you?!?!
We had some good times. Whenever I see someone drinking Guinness, I think of you and Shawn. hehe. =P
Crap. I gotta go! I guess that's it for my trip down memory lane. forgot I needed to be somewhere! Arrgghhh!
Anyways friends, hope life finds you all well. Bless you.
Person #1) Chris Davlin. (aka Chris2, Curse or Cursy Wursy):
Where the heck are you? Chris is my friend from high school. I have this memory of him singing to me at the piano in the choir room. I also have numerous memories of walks, and talks, and coffees. Life has gone different ways for us, judging from the last time we spoke. ( I think about eight years ago, maybe seven), but I love him still, as if I were there listening to him sing.
*I memorized that poem you wrote in my 11th grade yearbook. That poem meant more to me than anything I ever read in a book.
#2 & #3) Joe Powers & Bill Yen (two guys I met on the way to Olympia)
Okay, so I didn't know them very long, but some people have a profound impact alright?! Joe was the best friend. Well, if you must, best friend with all those oogly googly feelings. =) Bill was big brother (even though we were the same age) We all got along so well. I loved those guys for that time we spent together, and I still think about them once in awhile. Fond memories. Very fond.
*Joe, I think I have a nametag that belongs to you.
#4) Deena Worden (Who I met in Amsterdam)
Deena. I miss ya. One of my fondest memories from my time in Amsterdam, is creeping down to the kitchen at 11:30 p.m. and sitting in the dark drinking tea, and usually eating popcorn, with you and Marcos. What I wouldn't give to be back there right now. I wish I could have transported that nightly occurence home with me. We didn't even hang out tons the rest of the time, but those nightly chats meant a lot to me, and I miss you two. I hope you are well.
#5) Angela Hernandez (was Pfeiffer)
Ang, I swear you have dropped off the face of the earth!!! How hard is it to drop an email once in six months?!?! How many kids do you have now anyway!?!?! =) Where ARE you?!?!
We had some good times. Whenever I see someone drinking Guinness, I think of you and Shawn. hehe. =P
Crap. I gotta go! I guess that's it for my trip down memory lane. forgot I needed to be somewhere! Arrgghhh!
Anyways friends, hope life finds you all well. Bless you.
Life is a Highway.
What the heck happens to people? I mean...where do they go? I think I just happen to live in one of those kinds of cities where everyone leaves and then they don't come back. Okay, wait, they do sometimes come back when they have spouses and little ones, and think this is a nice place to raise the fam. Single people my age are a little harder to come by. hehe. After 22, there is like this 10 year age gap of the missing.
People just seem to fall off the face of the earth. Not that I haven't wandered abroad and all, but now I am here and....where the heck is everyone else?
Anyway. My friends here are all; a) married (with children); b) getting married; c) under the age of 24. Not that any of these things are bad...but surely they are other single people over the age of 24 wandering around out there, who don't have to go home and put the kids to bed, who want to hang out. =) I am all about the friends. Not that I have anything against getting married. I mean, by all means, I am game! There just seems to be this one tiiiinnyy little problem. That's right, no groom. And, while I would like to run into him eventually, I would rather not be out there with my bincochulars looking for what eligible bachelor I can knock over the head and drag home. If it happens, it does. If not, there is more to life.
Speaking of more to life, I am saving my money to take another trip overseas. It's been too long really. One of my best friends lives in London, and I miss her. I'd like to go hang out with her awhile, and spend a week or so in Ireland and Scotland as well. I'll also probably fly to Amsterdam for a weekend at least. I think I still know a couple of people around there. It would be nice to see that city again.
I am taking a trip down memory lane inside my head right now. Every once in awhile I will still wake up from a dream that I am in Amsterdam. Usually it is so real, that I wake up going "No! I don't want to leave!" Of course, in my dreams the people I loved in A'dam are still there with me, so.... such is life.
I am ready to play the "Where are they now?" game.
People just seem to fall off the face of the earth. Not that I haven't wandered abroad and all, but now I am here and....where the heck is everyone else?
Anyway. My friends here are all; a) married (with children); b) getting married; c) under the age of 24. Not that any of these things are bad...but surely they are other single people over the age of 24 wandering around out there, who don't have to go home and put the kids to bed, who want to hang out. =) I am all about the friends. Not that I have anything against getting married. I mean, by all means, I am game! There just seems to be this one tiiiinnyy little problem. That's right, no groom. And, while I would like to run into him eventually, I would rather not be out there with my bincochulars looking for what eligible bachelor I can knock over the head and drag home. If it happens, it does. If not, there is more to life.
Speaking of more to life, I am saving my money to take another trip overseas. It's been too long really. One of my best friends lives in London, and I miss her. I'd like to go hang out with her awhile, and spend a week or so in Ireland and Scotland as well. I'll also probably fly to Amsterdam for a weekend at least. I think I still know a couple of people around there. It would be nice to see that city again.
I am taking a trip down memory lane inside my head right now. Every once in awhile I will still wake up from a dream that I am in Amsterdam. Usually it is so real, that I wake up going "No! I don't want to leave!" Of course, in my dreams the people I loved in A'dam are still there with me, so.... such is life.
I am ready to play the "Where are they now?" game.
Wednesday, July 06, 2005
Glenn Quinn
So, I confess. I am a huge Buffy the Vampire Slayer fan. I never thought this would happen, but my little sister got me hooked. Now, I am not saying that I agree with everything in that show, and that there is nothing I find morally questionable. However, the truth of it is, Joss Whedon is a brilliant man. It's seriously a fabulous show.
So anyway, I didn't hop on the bandwagon until around season 4, and even then I missed some later episodes. So I ended up buying some of the dvd's. The problem is, I got done with them. And now what do I do? So, I decided that I would have to venture into the Angel series. I should have known I would like it, since, again, Joss is brilliant.
I started watching the show and I just fell in love with Glenn Quinn (Doyle). I am all about the Irishmen. Yay Irish! woo! So anyway, I watched the first season, and then one day I decided to look up Glenn Quinn online, to see if he had any movies out or anything. I discovered that he had passed away in 2002. Died of a drug overdose. That just broke my heart. What a sad freaking world we live in. I lost a sister a little over a year before Glenn died, and my heart just so went out to his family. To lose somebody in such a way....
I really don't know very much about Glenn Quinn. He just seemed to have this positive energy that shone through his work. It still hurts my heart when I see him in those episodes. God bless his family, and may he rest in peace.
So anyway, I didn't hop on the bandwagon until around season 4, and even then I missed some later episodes. So I ended up buying some of the dvd's. The problem is, I got done with them. And now what do I do? So, I decided that I would have to venture into the Angel series. I should have known I would like it, since, again, Joss is brilliant.
I started watching the show and I just fell in love with Glenn Quinn (Doyle). I am all about the Irishmen. Yay Irish! woo! So anyway, I watched the first season, and then one day I decided to look up Glenn Quinn online, to see if he had any movies out or anything. I discovered that he had passed away in 2002. Died of a drug overdose. That just broke my heart. What a sad freaking world we live in. I lost a sister a little over a year before Glenn died, and my heart just so went out to his family. To lose somebody in such a way....
I really don't know very much about Glenn Quinn. He just seemed to have this positive energy that shone through his work. It still hurts my heart when I see him in those episodes. God bless his family, and may he rest in peace.
Friday, June 24, 2005
Scientology...and stuff
I don't get it. I mean, I don't get what all the fuss is about. Not that I agree with scientology or anything, but I'm not altogether sure that Tom Cruise should be burned at the stake. In any case, if we were into that again, he would definitely not be my first choice. In fact, he wouldn't even show up on my radar. And as for Katie Holmes...she's a big girl. I am all about people not getting mislead, but I doubt that most of these people who are all about "protecting" her, gave a rat's ass about her until she took up with Tom.
Now, if it was your friend, or your sister, or your neighbor who was getting caught up in something that you didn't believe in, by all means, speak up. I doubt the screaming voices of countless strangers, however, are having any major sway on Katie, who is currently living in the "love bubble."
What a crazy world we live in.
On a side note; I *am* going to look into scientology a little more, just so that I can know exactly what's wrong with it from a biblical standpoint.
In other non-important news...
I need a new plant. In fact, I am going to buy one of those more hearty ivy's, so that it can grow like a mad thing and take over my apartment. Easy to take care of. The only plants I have at the moment, are an Aralia (sp?), and a mutant Aloe Vera plant, that has launched at least ten other mini-mutants, and is currently hatching an escape plan. I don't know where it thinks it's going to crawl off to, but there are definitely a few pot scalers working on their get away.
Also, I got a second job. I just figured that a little more cash on the side would be a nice thing. I'd like to finish getting out of debt, go back to school, and buy a house in the next couple of years. So, ya know, resources always a bonus. =)
I really want to buy a bed. You know, a big, nice, cushy, four poster bed all for my very own. Okay, I am torn on the four posters, but you know what I am saying. A nice frame, and some fabulous expensive mattress, comforter, pillow shams......hehe. =)
I have made myself this promise, however, that I can't buy the bed until I am out of debt. *sigh* Grrr. Otherwise I will go and blow 2500$ on a bed, when that would have taken a nice chunk out of what I owe. (And by the way, that's not counting all the frilly bed things that go with it.) So...yeah. No bed for me!
Now, if it was your friend, or your sister, or your neighbor who was getting caught up in something that you didn't believe in, by all means, speak up. I doubt the screaming voices of countless strangers, however, are having any major sway on Katie, who is currently living in the "love bubble."
What a crazy world we live in.
On a side note; I *am* going to look into scientology a little more, just so that I can know exactly what's wrong with it from a biblical standpoint.
In other non-important news...
I need a new plant. In fact, I am going to buy one of those more hearty ivy's, so that it can grow like a mad thing and take over my apartment. Easy to take care of. The only plants I have at the moment, are an Aralia (sp?), and a mutant Aloe Vera plant, that has launched at least ten other mini-mutants, and is currently hatching an escape plan. I don't know where it thinks it's going to crawl off to, but there are definitely a few pot scalers working on their get away.
Also, I got a second job. I just figured that a little more cash on the side would be a nice thing. I'd like to finish getting out of debt, go back to school, and buy a house in the next couple of years. So, ya know, resources always a bonus. =)
I really want to buy a bed. You know, a big, nice, cushy, four poster bed all for my very own. Okay, I am torn on the four posters, but you know what I am saying. A nice frame, and some fabulous expensive mattress, comforter, pillow shams......hehe. =)
I have made myself this promise, however, that I can't buy the bed until I am out of debt. *sigh* Grrr. Otherwise I will go and blow 2500$ on a bed, when that would have taken a nice chunk out of what I owe. (And by the way, that's not counting all the frilly bed things that go with it.) So...yeah. No bed for me!
Friday, June 17, 2005
It Takes A Little Time
O.k., just for future information, I do attempt to title my blogs with something that at least relates to what I am writing, even if that connection is one that only I understand. That doesn't always happen though, so deal with it. =)
Today as I was sitting in my cubicle minding my own business, my cube-mate's (there's no dividing wall between he and I, just us and the other crazies) groupie stopped by for a visit. I call her his groupie, only because he has threatened me that she not be called his "at work girlfriend." His "real-life" girlfriend wouldn't take kindly to that, and besides, he has no interest in this girl whatsoever. So, the other day when she was hanging around our shared space, she was asking Mr.Z ( I just decided that's his name now) about some illegal activity she was thinking about participating in. Something dumb. He was, of course, advising her that it was dumb. Today when she came around I just sat and wondered...are all girls this dumb? I mean, she is young, so there's that whole immaturity thing she's got going, but even so..... I just started thinking, do young women learn anything anymore? This is a girl who totes around Christian books and perpetuates the stereotype "hypocrite." I just felt kind of bad for her, because she seems to be so shallow. I wondered if her parents really taught her anything about their morality, or sheltered her so that she didn't even know what choices to make.
I was thinking, geez, when and if I ever have kids of my own, I need to realize that there is going to be an age where they need to be brought in on making family decisions, and the things that we deal with as adults. Otherwise, by the time they get here themselves, they are just asking for trouble. There are a whole lot of people out there just waiting to exploit the naive. *sigh* It's sad, but if you want your kids to win the battle, they need to know what kind of enemy they are looking out for.
On a lighter note, it's Friday. =) That means I get to sleep in tomorrow, and boy do I ever intend on doing so. I refuse to accept any responsibility that will keep me from my bed tomorrow morning. =) So there.
Today as I was sitting in my cubicle minding my own business, my cube-mate's (there's no dividing wall between he and I, just us and the other crazies) groupie stopped by for a visit. I call her his groupie, only because he has threatened me that she not be called his "at work girlfriend." His "real-life" girlfriend wouldn't take kindly to that, and besides, he has no interest in this girl whatsoever. So, the other day when she was hanging around our shared space, she was asking Mr.Z ( I just decided that's his name now) about some illegal activity she was thinking about participating in. Something dumb. He was, of course, advising her that it was dumb. Today when she came around I just sat and wondered...are all girls this dumb? I mean, she is young, so there's that whole immaturity thing she's got going, but even so..... I just started thinking, do young women learn anything anymore? This is a girl who totes around Christian books and perpetuates the stereotype "hypocrite." I just felt kind of bad for her, because she seems to be so shallow. I wondered if her parents really taught her anything about their morality, or sheltered her so that she didn't even know what choices to make.
I was thinking, geez, when and if I ever have kids of my own, I need to realize that there is going to be an age where they need to be brought in on making family decisions, and the things that we deal with as adults. Otherwise, by the time they get here themselves, they are just asking for trouble. There are a whole lot of people out there just waiting to exploit the naive. *sigh* It's sad, but if you want your kids to win the battle, they need to know what kind of enemy they are looking out for.
On a lighter note, it's Friday. =) That means I get to sleep in tomorrow, and boy do I ever intend on doing so. I refuse to accept any responsibility that will keep me from my bed tomorrow morning. =) So there.
Thursday, June 16, 2005
Thursday.
So this morning, my phone rings and I pick it up (I am at work of course), and it's a dental office on the phone. I take the information I need, and then, right in the middle of talking to the lady, I choke on some imaginary object. Yeah. So here I am, trying not to hack in her ear, trying to be able to breath, and then speak. Poor lady was probably like; "What the heck is going on over there?!" Way to start the day. I got off the call as quickly as possible, and ten hacking minutes later I sort of felt like a breathing human being again. =)
So...I used to play online all the time. Four years ago, when I was a student and working part time, I randomly hopped on this Jennifer Knapp message board. Actually, I guess it was five years ago. I actually ended up there by accident, but made some interesting friends nevertheless. In fact, I have a small group of friends that I still keep in touch with, whom I have known solely online for the past five years. Joe, Steffi, Mahcee. They know who they are! =) Anyway, we used to have a blast with our late night (and early morning) chats. Alas, time marches on, and I was away from the internet for awhile. We still all keep in touch somehow, but I miss the old times. I missed the great community of the world wide web! Sure, there's some sickos out there, but there's also a lot of fabulous and interesting people online.
So, I am working on being BACK! Maybe not as often as I used to be, but you know, here and there at least. I am an information junky, so the computer isn't always a healthy place for me. I can stay online for hours, and not get enough sunlight. hehe. And I LOVE sunlight, so I have to fight the urge. =)
Yay for Paula who posted a comment! See? I am meeting new people already! What fun!
So...I used to play online all the time. Four years ago, when I was a student and working part time, I randomly hopped on this Jennifer Knapp message board. Actually, I guess it was five years ago. I actually ended up there by accident, but made some interesting friends nevertheless. In fact, I have a small group of friends that I still keep in touch with, whom I have known solely online for the past five years. Joe, Steffi, Mahcee. They know who they are! =) Anyway, we used to have a blast with our late night (and early morning) chats. Alas, time marches on, and I was away from the internet for awhile. We still all keep in touch somehow, but I miss the old times. I missed the great community of the world wide web! Sure, there's some sickos out there, but there's also a lot of fabulous and interesting people online.
So, I am working on being BACK! Maybe not as often as I used to be, but you know, here and there at least. I am an information junky, so the computer isn't always a healthy place for me. I can stay online for hours, and not get enough sunlight. hehe. And I LOVE sunlight, so I have to fight the urge. =)
Yay for Paula who posted a comment! See? I am meeting new people already! What fun!
Wednesday, June 15, 2005
Learning to Blog
Well, since I just posted a comment on someone else's blog, I guess that I should at least make an effort to use my own. I heard that this was easy, and maybe it is, but I am confused and trying to figure it out on my own! =P I need to ask Joe to give me some pointers or something. I'm still using my online journal occassionally at diary-x, but it was time to try something new and so here I am.
Since I am at work and don't have a lot of time before I need to go back to focusing on worky types of things, I am going to forgo deep thought and post one of those lists that everyone is passing about. Might as well get it over with ya know?
50 Things About Me...
1.) I love Maple trees. There is something so glorious about Maple trees, and I love where I live and the streets that are lined with them.
2.) I love U2. Although Bono and I don't always share the same views on Politics, his band still rocks, their music is fab, and it just makes me feel inspired. =)
3.) Tea is the most wonderful drink on earth. If it's hot I prefer it black, if it's iced I prefer it sweet. =)
4.) Contrary to what my mother might think, I do NOT love talking on the phone all day. In fact, I am sick of talking so much at all!
5.) Everyone should have a claw foot bathtub...or another big kind with jets. =)
6.) Swimming is good. Yay for swimming. =)
7.) I love Montana. Maybe I should rephrase that. I love the West side of Montana. I've never been past Billings. However, if you have never been to the Flathead Valley, it is time to take a vacation. There is nothing like taking a quiet walk in the mornings, seeing the mist rising off the lake that is ringed by the most majestic mountains. Unbelievable.
8.) I want to write a book.
9.) I want to go back to Amsterdam and drink cider.
10.) Way too many of my close friends are having twins, so it's a good thing I'm single.
11.) I love talking to people online, but I am very guarded sharing my online journals with most of the people I know in person. Does that say something about the people I know? =(
12.) I wish it was Saturday, raining, and I could drink tea and read a good book right now. =)
13.) I am taking a photography class this summer! Fun!
14.) Being single has it's benefits.
15.) This is the 21st Century. There is no such thing as an old maid.
16.) Go Brett Favre!!!! Woo Hoo!
17.) I have seen Anne of Green Gables about five million times. Even more than Dirty Dancing, and the Sound of Music, and that's a feat, let me tell ya.
18.) French Fries. Yum.
19.) When I went to Washington, D.C. my favorite thing was the Iwo Jima Memorial. (but it was all cool)
20.) I can always think of 50 things to write when I am not writing.
21.) There's just something about the smell of a new book. Ahhh. =)
22.) I love the smell of pine trees. Good thing I live in the "Evergreen" state. =P
23.) I have an uncanny knack for running into blogs of other christians.
24.) I like to go for walks in the park...and lots of other places. =)
25.) I have a 16 year old sister who loves frogs.
26.) I've been listening to the latest Kelly Clarkson cd for like a week now. I ought go back to Shane & Shane.
27.) I wonder if anyone else loves Shane & Shane as much as I do?
28.) former YWAMer
29.) I wish I could sing like Amy Lee.
30.) I wish I could have my English degree by osmosis.
31.) One of my favorite things to do is to drive to Mnt Spokane, past all the wheat fields, preferrably around dusk, just because I feel like it. Maybe listening to a little Tim McGraw?!
32.) I hate forwards. If you want to email me, just do it for God's sake. A few people can be counted on to only send the rare, and genuinely hilarious forward, but usually they are a sever waste of time. No, I will not sign your petition, or pass this on to five of my friends before my dog dies, or my car breaks down.
33.) I am halfway through a Tale of Two Cities, and the Two Towers. A Tale of Two Cities was much more interesting before I started to reread Tolkien. hehe.
34.) I suck at my job. =(
35.) I dream of having a job I don't suck at, that I like. =)
36.) Is it time to go home yet?
37.) I like reading other people's lists. Like the ones everyone sends you through email.
38.) Anyone else like to play in the rain?
39.) Last weekend I bought a book on Constitutional Law. Ahh time for learning.
40.) I want a puppy, but it is totally impractical in my life right now.
41.) If I could I would buy a house and get some equity for crying out loud.
42.) The other day I read this article about John Ryhs-Davies and I thought "Wow, this guy rocks."
43.) My back currently hurts very badly.
44.) Still not time to go home.
45.) time for me to go pick up a bridesmaid dress that I am horribly afraid is not going to fit me now. Grrr. Time for crash dieting.
46.) It's nice to be able to sit on the porch on summer evenings.
47.) I'd like to have a nice home where I could have a lot of barbecues and do a lot of entertaining.
48.) Sometimes it blows my mind how much other people love being "business people."
49.) I need a change of scenery once in awhile. I get bored. Viggo Mortensen says there is no excuse for getting bored. Maybe I need to have more creativity like he does and I wouldn't be bored either. =)
50.) I have successfully completed my second blog post. Cheer for me.
12.)
Since I am at work and don't have a lot of time before I need to go back to focusing on worky types of things, I am going to forgo deep thought and post one of those lists that everyone is passing about. Might as well get it over with ya know?
50 Things About Me...
1.) I love Maple trees. There is something so glorious about Maple trees, and I love where I live and the streets that are lined with them.
2.) I love U2. Although Bono and I don't always share the same views on Politics, his band still rocks, their music is fab, and it just makes me feel inspired. =)
3.) Tea is the most wonderful drink on earth. If it's hot I prefer it black, if it's iced I prefer it sweet. =)
4.) Contrary to what my mother might think, I do NOT love talking on the phone all day. In fact, I am sick of talking so much at all!
5.) Everyone should have a claw foot bathtub...or another big kind with jets. =)
6.) Swimming is good. Yay for swimming. =)
7.) I love Montana. Maybe I should rephrase that. I love the West side of Montana. I've never been past Billings. However, if you have never been to the Flathead Valley, it is time to take a vacation. There is nothing like taking a quiet walk in the mornings, seeing the mist rising off the lake that is ringed by the most majestic mountains. Unbelievable.
8.) I want to write a book.
9.) I want to go back to Amsterdam and drink cider.
10.) Way too many of my close friends are having twins, so it's a good thing I'm single.
11.) I love talking to people online, but I am very guarded sharing my online journals with most of the people I know in person. Does that say something about the people I know? =(
12.) I wish it was Saturday, raining, and I could drink tea and read a good book right now. =)
13.) I am taking a photography class this summer! Fun!
14.) Being single has it's benefits.
15.) This is the 21st Century. There is no such thing as an old maid.
16.) Go Brett Favre!!!! Woo Hoo!
17.) I have seen Anne of Green Gables about five million times. Even more than Dirty Dancing, and the Sound of Music, and that's a feat, let me tell ya.
18.) French Fries. Yum.
19.) When I went to Washington, D.C. my favorite thing was the Iwo Jima Memorial. (but it was all cool)
20.) I can always think of 50 things to write when I am not writing.
21.) There's just something about the smell of a new book. Ahhh. =)
22.) I love the smell of pine trees. Good thing I live in the "Evergreen" state. =P
23.) I have an uncanny knack for running into blogs of other christians.
24.) I like to go for walks in the park...and lots of other places. =)
25.) I have a 16 year old sister who loves frogs.
26.) I've been listening to the latest Kelly Clarkson cd for like a week now. I ought go back to Shane & Shane.
27.) I wonder if anyone else loves Shane & Shane as much as I do?
28.) former YWAMer
29.) I wish I could sing like Amy Lee.
30.) I wish I could have my English degree by osmosis.
31.) One of my favorite things to do is to drive to Mnt Spokane, past all the wheat fields, preferrably around dusk, just because I feel like it. Maybe listening to a little Tim McGraw?!
32.) I hate forwards. If you want to email me, just do it for God's sake. A few people can be counted on to only send the rare, and genuinely hilarious forward, but usually they are a sever waste of time. No, I will not sign your petition, or pass this on to five of my friends before my dog dies, or my car breaks down.
33.) I am halfway through a Tale of Two Cities, and the Two Towers. A Tale of Two Cities was much more interesting before I started to reread Tolkien. hehe.
34.) I suck at my job. =(
35.) I dream of having a job I don't suck at, that I like. =)
36.) Is it time to go home yet?
37.) I like reading other people's lists. Like the ones everyone sends you through email.
38.) Anyone else like to play in the rain?
39.) Last weekend I bought a book on Constitutional Law. Ahh time for learning.
40.) I want a puppy, but it is totally impractical in my life right now.
41.) If I could I would buy a house and get some equity for crying out loud.
42.) The other day I read this article about John Ryhs-Davies and I thought "Wow, this guy rocks."
43.) My back currently hurts very badly.
44.) Still not time to go home.
45.) time for me to go pick up a bridesmaid dress that I am horribly afraid is not going to fit me now. Grrr. Time for crash dieting.
46.) It's nice to be able to sit on the porch on summer evenings.
47.) I'd like to have a nice home where I could have a lot of barbecues and do a lot of entertaining.
48.) Sometimes it blows my mind how much other people love being "business people."
49.) I need a change of scenery once in awhile. I get bored. Viggo Mortensen says there is no excuse for getting bored. Maybe I need to have more creativity like he does and I wouldn't be bored either. =)
50.) I have successfully completed my second blog post. Cheer for me.
12.)
Thursday, May 12, 2005
Here we go then.
Well now. Lookit here. I have my very own blog.
That is not to be mistaken with an online journal. Oh no. It's all about the "blog" these days. =)
O-kay, well, I just thought I would try this bandwagon out...join the big wide world of blogging. I'll keep it short and sweet as I am sure I have nothing very interesting to say at the moment, and besides, I am busy doing work type things.
Just thought I'd try it out. =)
That is not to be mistaken with an online journal. Oh no. It's all about the "blog" these days. =)
O-kay, well, I just thought I would try this bandwagon out...join the big wide world of blogging. I'll keep it short and sweet as I am sure I have nothing very interesting to say at the moment, and besides, I am busy doing work type things.
Just thought I'd try it out. =)
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