I'm having one of those moments, where reality just sinks in. I'm not sure how to explain exactly. Nothing major has happened to cause this, I just feel firmly planted at the moment. It's kind of good actually. Sometimes I live far out in space. =P It's this problem I have. ha!!
That is my random information for today. My back has been feeling so much better, but right now it hurts and I probably should go to bed and get some rest. I still have a long weekend of work ahead of me. *sigh* It would be nice to have a day off where I am not just laying in bed in pain. I'm a little worn out from it to be honest.
Okay, short entry tonight, but it's all I've got.
Saturday, September 30, 2006
Monday, September 25, 2006
Ouchie. Ouchie. Ouchie.
Phooey on Monday mornings. Good thing there is football on tonight or this day would be completely irredeemable! haha.
At roughy 6:15 this morning, standing in the drive-thru window at Starbucks, my back abruptly gave out. At least, I guess that's what it did. It hurts....a lot. When I am just taking a small step I sometimes feel like I am about to hit the floor, and also, I can't even lift a gallon of milk. It's not pretty. Lifting a gallon of milk is pretty important when you work at Starbucks. hehe.
Needless to say, I am now at home. It's hard to work when it causes you pain just to hand someone their change out the window.
Rawr.
I would kill for a fabulous muscle relaxer right now.
I must face the inevitable visit to the chiropractor. Maybe I can also go to the massage therapist. That's something I can get into. My old chiropractor in Spokane had a massage therapy place right in their office!!! Is that normal? It's fabulous anyway. I'm probably going to have to get a new x-ray of my spine. Joy.
Actually, I have no medical coverage to go to the chiropractor. My benefits are great actually, its just that I never go to the doctor, so I chose the cheapest possible plan. I mean, if I got strep throat it would be no problem. Of course, I can change my plan, but in the meantime...Grr. I *do* have coverage for physical therapy, so I am going to have to see a doctor and go from there. Bleh.
In leiu of muscle relaxers I have opted for ibuprofen and Kahlua. hehe One does what one can. :p
I am sitting at the computer because I don't want to lay in bed all day long. It just doesn't sound very appealing. My treatment method hasn't kicked in yet though, and boy am I hurting!! So, I could be in bed with a stack of dvd's anytime now. :p
Thank God for a good attitude.
If I were crabby pants this could be so much worse. =)
At roughy 6:15 this morning, standing in the drive-thru window at Starbucks, my back abruptly gave out. At least, I guess that's what it did. It hurts....a lot. When I am just taking a small step I sometimes feel like I am about to hit the floor, and also, I can't even lift a gallon of milk. It's not pretty. Lifting a gallon of milk is pretty important when you work at Starbucks. hehe.
Needless to say, I am now at home. It's hard to work when it causes you pain just to hand someone their change out the window.
Rawr.
I would kill for a fabulous muscle relaxer right now.
I must face the inevitable visit to the chiropractor. Maybe I can also go to the massage therapist. That's something I can get into. My old chiropractor in Spokane had a massage therapy place right in their office!!! Is that normal? It's fabulous anyway. I'm probably going to have to get a new x-ray of my spine. Joy.
Actually, I have no medical coverage to go to the chiropractor. My benefits are great actually, its just that I never go to the doctor, so I chose the cheapest possible plan. I mean, if I got strep throat it would be no problem. Of course, I can change my plan, but in the meantime...Grr. I *do* have coverage for physical therapy, so I am going to have to see a doctor and go from there. Bleh.
In leiu of muscle relaxers I have opted for ibuprofen and Kahlua. hehe One does what one can. :p
I am sitting at the computer because I don't want to lay in bed all day long. It just doesn't sound very appealing. My treatment method hasn't kicked in yet though, and boy am I hurting!! So, I could be in bed with a stack of dvd's anytime now. :p
Thank God for a good attitude.
If I were crabby pants this could be so much worse. =)
Monday, September 18, 2006
It's raining, it's pouring...
Okay, well, technically not pouring. =P In fact, I think I see some sunshine out the window! Still, it was pretty soggy this morning and I LIKED it! Might as well document this here, so that in six months when I am like....WOULD IT PLEASE STOP RAINING?!?! You can all snicker. haha
I. love. Seattle. I really do. More than I thought I did.
Yesterday, once again, I drove downtown and met Ryan and we went to Mars Hill. Of course, yesterday a Seahawks game had just gotten over, and there were like a kazillion jerseyed football fans everywhere. Unlike myself, this did not even stress me out. I was feeling very happy driving into Seattle. It's this weird thing that happens to me. I just like going there. And, ya know, I have always liked Seattle, but it's different now.
I almost didn't go to church yesterday. I worked until 1, and then I came home and Lance and Jeni were sorthing all of the left over boxes and things in the garage, trying to get the last bits of their house in order. So I contributed by sweeping, and mopping, and doing dishes and whatnot. My back hurt and I was a little tired, and I knew I had a long week ahead of me, but I also knew that Seattle makes me happy. hehe.
Besides, I felt like I should go. Know what I mean? So I went, and I was so glad. The sermon was good, as I think they usually are, but there must also just be something in the atmosphere there that seeps into me, because when I leave I always feel like a tiny bit of life has settled in my bones, and I always feel great when I am driving home again.
Okay, maybe it's not fair to say "always" since I have only done it a couple of times so far...Maybe so far so great would be better. =)
So today I was driving home from work, and it was rainy and dreary and everything looked very green. I just felt this well of emotions rise up in me, that I don't really know how to explain. I wish I did have the words, because then later I could look back and go "Oh yeah!! That is exactly how I felt!"
I did think about Amsterdam...I have this pair of black shoes that I bought in Amsterdam. They are just kind of sleek and fashionably functional. They are perfect for walking in the rain. They don't slip on anything wet. Amsterdam is one of those trend setting fashion cities, and there are always crazy things on the street. People go by in crazy outfits with huge, glittery hot-pink mohawks and stuff like that. Then there are a bunch of people that just look like super-models. The thing I remember the most however is just....well, again, the word sleek comes to mind.
Of course, as far as fitness there is that European practice of walking everywhere, and riding your bike. (Plus they have to climb up and down all those obscenely long spiral staircases!) It's not like everyone is super thin either, they just look good. Lots of well dressed, sleek looking people, moving with purpose, side by side with the crazy fasion statement crowd.
At least, that's what is in my memory. I could have made it up. haha.
Ahhh Memories.
Shawn sent me a postcard from back east, and she mentioned being homesick for Europe. It just really is a different world. I really hope I get to go back someday....before something crazy happens...(my fear of which I will not at this time elaborate on)
Well, that's just about all I have to say today. I am living in a strange place at the moment; right between the past and the hopeful future. I am processing.
Here I go to do some more of that...!
Adios!
*For the whole two of you who might have any clue what I am talking about, I am and am not giving up on my lame (very very lame) search, but am very close to offering 50$ to whichever friend can definitively locate the elusive JP. Of course, that is a piddly amount considering the trouble I have gone to already without actually hiring myself a spy. ha. ha. It just sounded good for a moment.
I. love. Seattle. I really do. More than I thought I did.
Yesterday, once again, I drove downtown and met Ryan and we went to Mars Hill. Of course, yesterday a Seahawks game had just gotten over, and there were like a kazillion jerseyed football fans everywhere. Unlike myself, this did not even stress me out. I was feeling very happy driving into Seattle. It's this weird thing that happens to me. I just like going there. And, ya know, I have always liked Seattle, but it's different now.
I almost didn't go to church yesterday. I worked until 1, and then I came home and Lance and Jeni were sorthing all of the left over boxes and things in the garage, trying to get the last bits of their house in order. So I contributed by sweeping, and mopping, and doing dishes and whatnot. My back hurt and I was a little tired, and I knew I had a long week ahead of me, but I also knew that Seattle makes me happy. hehe.
Besides, I felt like I should go. Know what I mean? So I went, and I was so glad. The sermon was good, as I think they usually are, but there must also just be something in the atmosphere there that seeps into me, because when I leave I always feel like a tiny bit of life has settled in my bones, and I always feel great when I am driving home again.
Okay, maybe it's not fair to say "always" since I have only done it a couple of times so far...Maybe so far so great would be better. =)
So today I was driving home from work, and it was rainy and dreary and everything looked very green. I just felt this well of emotions rise up in me, that I don't really know how to explain. I wish I did have the words, because then later I could look back and go "Oh yeah!! That is exactly how I felt!"
I did think about Amsterdam...I have this pair of black shoes that I bought in Amsterdam. They are just kind of sleek and fashionably functional. They are perfect for walking in the rain. They don't slip on anything wet. Amsterdam is one of those trend setting fashion cities, and there are always crazy things on the street. People go by in crazy outfits with huge, glittery hot-pink mohawks and stuff like that. Then there are a bunch of people that just look like super-models. The thing I remember the most however is just....well, again, the word sleek comes to mind.
Of course, as far as fitness there is that European practice of walking everywhere, and riding your bike. (Plus they have to climb up and down all those obscenely long spiral staircases!) It's not like everyone is super thin either, they just look good. Lots of well dressed, sleek looking people, moving with purpose, side by side with the crazy fasion statement crowd.
At least, that's what is in my memory. I could have made it up. haha.
Ahhh Memories.
Shawn sent me a postcard from back east, and she mentioned being homesick for Europe. It just really is a different world. I really hope I get to go back someday....before something crazy happens...(my fear of which I will not at this time elaborate on)
Well, that's just about all I have to say today. I am living in a strange place at the moment; right between the past and the hopeful future. I am processing.
Here I go to do some more of that...!
Adios!
*For the whole two of you who might have any clue what I am talking about, I am and am not giving up on my lame (very very lame) search, but am very close to offering 50$ to whichever friend can definitively locate the elusive JP. Of course, that is a piddly amount considering the trouble I have gone to already without actually hiring myself a spy. ha. ha. It just sounded good for a moment.
Saturday, September 16, 2006
Searching...
Today I got an email from Beth, letting us all know how school is going and whatnot. She mentioned fall, and how this is the time of year where she misses Spokane. It does have a high degree of fall splendour...especially on the south hill in the middle of a forest of Maple trees.....my favorite.
To be honest, I hadn't really thought about it though. I have some nostalgia for the gray weather of this region. An inspirational week in rainy Olympia from way back in the day, and a transformational three months in rainy Amsterdam. Good things have happened for me in gray and rainy places. Perhaps it just gives me a sense of hope. Weird, I know, but there it is.
I was talking to a couple of people this week about my plans and about what I want for my future. Of course, I don't really have a lot of answers to those questions. I am relatively non stressed out by thinking about it though, which is a nice change from days gone by.
For whatever reason memories are flooding back to me and I am sorting through plans long past. I am also sorting through faces in my mind, and for good or bad, find myself searching for people and ideas that were long ago lost to me.
It's been my experience (and certainly not mine alone) that to truly move forward you have to let go of the past. There are a couple of things from my past that keep resurfacing for me, not in any super negative way, but just in terms of being distracting enough that I am starting to think I'm going to have to face them down. I am not completely sure how that will be accomplished, but in one case, there is a person I feel like I need to see. I'm sure all it would take is a brief encounter to lodge our current reality firmly into my brain, but even so, that is easier said than done. What seems simple can also be very complicated.
In any case, it is my attempt to move forward that has me desiring to look the past (good and bad) squarely in the face and say; "Move out of my way." hehe.
So the past couple of days I find myself searching, searching for avenues...onces that I have yet to find. That's where I am, and that's really all there is.
To be honest, I hadn't really thought about it though. I have some nostalgia for the gray weather of this region. An inspirational week in rainy Olympia from way back in the day, and a transformational three months in rainy Amsterdam. Good things have happened for me in gray and rainy places. Perhaps it just gives me a sense of hope. Weird, I know, but there it is.
I was talking to a couple of people this week about my plans and about what I want for my future. Of course, I don't really have a lot of answers to those questions. I am relatively non stressed out by thinking about it though, which is a nice change from days gone by.
For whatever reason memories are flooding back to me and I am sorting through plans long past. I am also sorting through faces in my mind, and for good or bad, find myself searching for people and ideas that were long ago lost to me.
It's been my experience (and certainly not mine alone) that to truly move forward you have to let go of the past. There are a couple of things from my past that keep resurfacing for me, not in any super negative way, but just in terms of being distracting enough that I am starting to think I'm going to have to face them down. I am not completely sure how that will be accomplished, but in one case, there is a person I feel like I need to see. I'm sure all it would take is a brief encounter to lodge our current reality firmly into my brain, but even so, that is easier said than done. What seems simple can also be very complicated.
In any case, it is my attempt to move forward that has me desiring to look the past (good and bad) squarely in the face and say; "Move out of my way." hehe.
So the past couple of days I find myself searching, searching for avenues...onces that I have yet to find. That's where I am, and that's really all there is.
Wednesday, September 13, 2006
Yeah yeah yeah
Okay, I know that I am a bad little blogger, but there just isn't much to tell, and to be honest, I have just been too busy doing other things to sit here and update.
Work is fine, everyone is nice, so that is a relief. hehe. I am still applying for other jobs, but it's no big emergency.
Today I looked at online programs to get a degree in Homeland Security or something like. They probably cost a gazillion dollars, as do most things pertaining to education...oh well. Anyway, did you know that you can get an AS in homeland security? Crazy. I hate math and science but....maybe I could suck it up. Anyway, it was just one of those things I felt like doing. I really hate school so....who knows. I've never tried doing it online.
Nothing really exciting to share today. It actually sort of rained this morning, which is a first since I've been here, and that only last about ten minutes. It's just been cool and gray ever since then. I actually see blue sky out the window for the first time all day. I like the gray though. =) Okay, maybe in January when I feel depressed I will have changed my mind, but since that has yet to happen I am going with positive thinking.
I spent three months in dreary, cold, windy Amsterdam September through December, and I loved it, so how bad can this place be??? It doesn't even snow here for crying out loud...there are no canals to freeze solid, and the freezing, nearly solid feeling, chill-you-to-your-bones, icey air isn't going to blow in off the north sea. Granted, it might feel colder in downtown Seattle with wind coming in off of Puget Sound, but I am not there, and it's still warmer here than home...just a different kind of cold. More humid.
Speaking of cold, it is chilly here in the basement, and besides, I have things to do so I must away!
Adios!!!
Work is fine, everyone is nice, so that is a relief. hehe. I am still applying for other jobs, but it's no big emergency.
Today I looked at online programs to get a degree in Homeland Security or something like. They probably cost a gazillion dollars, as do most things pertaining to education...oh well. Anyway, did you know that you can get an AS in homeland security? Crazy. I hate math and science but....maybe I could suck it up. Anyway, it was just one of those things I felt like doing. I really hate school so....who knows. I've never tried doing it online.
Nothing really exciting to share today. It actually sort of rained this morning, which is a first since I've been here, and that only last about ten minutes. It's just been cool and gray ever since then. I actually see blue sky out the window for the first time all day. I like the gray though. =) Okay, maybe in January when I feel depressed I will have changed my mind, but since that has yet to happen I am going with positive thinking.
I spent three months in dreary, cold, windy Amsterdam September through December, and I loved it, so how bad can this place be??? It doesn't even snow here for crying out loud...there are no canals to freeze solid, and the freezing, nearly solid feeling, chill-you-to-your-bones, icey air isn't going to blow in off the north sea. Granted, it might feel colder in downtown Seattle with wind coming in off of Puget Sound, but I am not there, and it's still warmer here than home...just a different kind of cold. More humid.
Speaking of cold, it is chilly here in the basement, and besides, I have things to do so I must away!
Adios!!!
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